Thursday, August 4, 2011

Heaven is Hell

I always thought that the idea of heaven was an oxymoron: A “paradise” populated by bunch of tattle tales, finks and judgmental moralists who eschew pleasures of the flesh and promote Spartan lifestyles. Who would want to spend eternity with a crew like that?
Image by Bificus
Two Christian groups unsuccessfully sued San Diego State for refusing to grant them official status, the Los Angeles Times reported yesterday. An exclusively Christian sorority, Alpha Delta Chi and an exclusively Christian fraternity, Alpha Gamma Omega, sued the school in 2005 after the university refused to recognize them and provide access to university facilities, meeting rooms and the use of school logos. A federal appeals court upheld the university’s nondiscrimination policy forbidding student organizations from limiting membership based on race, religion, gender or sexual orientation.

Ostensibly, the groups could have maintained their religious themes AND won university approval had they accepted anyone. But who would want to join other than pious Christians? Binge drinking and competitive screwing would be supplanted by competitive proselytizing and binge praying. Late night porn and horror flicks would be replaced with God TV, The Worship Network and Sky Angel. Community service activities might include waving fetus-on-sticks in the faces of women trying to obtain reproductive health care from Planned Parenthood.

Count me out.

Regular beer swilling, chest thumping, date raping frats are bad enough.

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